Sunday, March 16, 2008


I am.
Today I asked my husband,
What are we going to do?
He shuffled oddly forward.
Irked me.
What are you DOING?
Putting one foot
in front of the other,
he tells me.
But HOW?
School, doctors, bills, jobs.
Tests. Answers. Diagnoses.
Friends, birthday parties. Social awkwardness.
Therapies, therapies, therapies, therapies.
Expectations. Travel. Travel expectations. Expected travels.
Week days, weekends, holidays. Summer!
IEPs, Regional Centers, doctors.
Strangers. Ignorance. Questions.
It is all too hard, too many feet, one at a time.
I want to run.
Lord, give me patience, and hurry it up.
I am scared tonight of even the fear.


Niksmom said...

One step at a time, my dear. One step at a time. Focus on today and what's right in front of you. The rest will come in its time.

Christine said...

The beginning is the hardest. Knowing what to believe, weighing everything, figuring out where to focus your energies when you barely have any to spare -- it is HARD. Give yourself time. Be good to yourself!!! Don't feel like you have to rush into anything or that you have to figure it all out now. It is a marathon, not a sprint, as they say.