Chasing Shadows

This is the message I shouldn't/probably won't/am not allowed by my husband to leave at the agency where we get our shadow, without whom my son cannot attend school, and many thanks for letting me get it out of my system here and now so I don't die of toxemia or something:

Them: Thank you for calling Shadows Are Us, leave a message and we'll get back to you a day late and a dollar short with a little attitude.

BEEP.

Me: Hello, this is Rooster's mom calling. You remember me, I'm the mom you kept promising to get back to for months and months and then I left you the message about how you'd hear from my attorney? And then you sent that guy Nate who didn't pay any more attention to the the teachers in the classroom than the four year olds did? And then this year you assigned us a recent college graduate whose job experience at Starbucks probably gave her the impression its not a big deal to call in sick every other Friday, most Mondays, and on alternate days that end in y. But this year it has been a big deal for our family. And so I called to tell you something I think you'll find pretty interesting. I sit in A LOT of waiting rooms. Do you know what special needs parents do with those countless hours in waiting rooms? We help each other. I have recommended to other parents my OT, my PT, some decent doctors, and countless products, books, and web sites. I have never once recommended your agency, not for its behaviorist services and not for its speech services. And you know what? I never will. The sub you sent today? She was great. Fantastic. The problem is, it's the 17th or 18th time my son's shadow has needed a sub this year. And it's the first time you ever sent a sub. We need yet another sub tomorrow, and you don't have one for us. So I probably will miss work. Again. Do you know that in 8 years teaching fifth grade I didn't miss as many days as our shadow has missed in the last nine months? And do you know how rude the people are at your agency? Kinda like this voice mail. Rude. But what comes around goes around. Thanks, I know you think you do us a world of good. I hope someday you need a world of good your own self. Then you will GET IT. Got it?