Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Going Crazy?

My husband bought us tickets to get away for a couple of days just before Christmas.

Is going crazy? Or is not going crazy?

I reread the first sentence and I can't believe I am actually talking about my own life. Really? Me, go somewhere? Without kids?

I want to go, of course, and I surely need to go, but I am scared.
I remember when Mama Mara went, and I cheered reading her blog about going, and when she got nervous as her trip approached, I willed her to go, go, go. And she did. And she had a wonderful, amazing time, and she needed it. And while she was gone? Her wusband did an awful job trying to fill her big shoes.

My in-laws plan to come and cover for us while we head off to a non-casino getaway in Vegas, where it is far enough away to count as a trip, close enough to fly for less than an hour, and cheap compared to everywhere else. We don't gamble, but we like the sound of the luxury resort and spa he found, and it came highly recommended by colleagues of his.

My in-laws do a wonderful job with my kids. I venture to say that they do better than I do with them in many ways. They love my kids, and my kids adore them. As do I. But. We are talking three nights, here, people. We are talking about counting on someone else to be gfcf vigilant, to drive my wild ones through mighty urban sprawl, to keep the combatants from hurting one another, to change diapers, to administer medications. Mara's wusband couldn't manage the medicines. What if my in-laws can't?

I am terrified of going. Terrified of how the kids will do while we're gone. Terrified of the fallout when I return. But the idea of turning down the trip? Also not good.

My days are long and complicated and exhausting. So I need a break. But my days are long and complicated and exhausting. So how can I leave them to anyone else? How would I ever begin to explain to them the intricacies of survival around here?

Worried.

5 comments:

pixiemama said...

Go ahead and worry, but please GO.

Have a serious talk with the in-laws about the GFCF diet, and why it's imperative that they cooperate. Leave no forbidden foods in your house. Stock it full of GFCF "treats," because grandparents really like to give treats.

Then let go of all of your other expectations, because they WILL survive a few days without you, and, no, things WON'T get done the way you do them, but do they really have to?

Please, go!

PBear said...

GO.

Three days is not a lifetime. They will all survive whaever happens. And your inlaws did alright raising your husband, right? If they get along with the kids, and the kids love them, that's 99% of the battle. Yes, there will be problems, no, they won't do as perfect a job as you do - but everyone will be fine. It will be excellent bonding time for them (and may even get you some more time off in the future, as they come to really appreciate what you go through every day). There are two of them that will be there all the time, not like with you two trying to juggle work and the kids. They'll manage. And if no one leaves the house for 3 days, so what? They'd survive that too.

GO. You need it. You deserve it.

Karin

Niksmom said...

GO! Ditto to the other comments. It won't be like having mama there but it'll be fine. GO!

Mama Mara said...

Find your inner wild woman and get thee the heck out of Dodge! And for a few days, pretend you don't have kids. It rocks.

I'm so excited for you that I am sending you a big Marzan yell: AAAAAAAAAaaaheeeaaaaaheeeaheeah.!

Paula said...

You MUST go. You MUST spend time working on your relationship with your husband. If we lose that, we lose EVERYTHING. I agree with PBear -- perhaps this will prompt more time off when your ILs see what you two go through on a daily basis.

I hired a non-close friend, non-relative, teenager (for God sake) as a babysitter the other night. Did all go smoothly? No, but my kids had fun, and I got out to spend time with other moms. It was scary -- the first time and all. But, now, I'm less scared. I was scared the first time I left my husband alone with our first child when I went on a business trip. I was scared the first time when I left both children home with my husband when I went on another business trip. But, each time got easier, knowing they would be okay. I hope that happens for you too.

You NEED the time away. I wish you blissful sleep and FUN!