And They're Off

"How was the first day of school?"
A Top Ten List from Rooster
(numbering system, entirely his; enumerated on the endless drive home)

"ONE: Terrible! I did NOT like having an aide after school. I told daddy I do not want her to come anymore and he did not listen to me. And I hate it!
TWO: She came and I DID NOT WANT HER TO and I AM SO MAD.
THREE: And I DON'T want her to come back EVER AGAIN. I don't want to see her FACE!
FOUR: And I DON'T want her help with my homework!!!! I want her to stop it!
FIVE: She came anyway today and I did NOT like that! And I'm going to put daddy on a consequence for that! It's not right!
SIX: And I never want to see her again! I'm ALL DONE.
SEVEN: She just showed up and I told daddy I DO. NOT. NEED HER!!!!GRRRRR! I'm ANGRY.
SEVEN: Yeah, seven. She better not come back tomorrow. DON'T SAY SHE IS. She is NOT!!!
NINE: I told daddy I would be good and I was good and now I DO NOT HAVE TO HAVE HER and that is what I SAID but she came anyway.
TEN: So I DON'T WANT TO HAVE AN AIDE ANYMORE BECAUSE IT'S TERRIBLE! ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME? BECAUSE I AM SO MAD, MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!"

Well. That was a fun day. I drove for about six months around Los Angeles in a billion degrees to rush my grateful children to their new schools and get to my new job and then reverse the whole deal, to be greeted so cheerfully by my oldest child, then race with him as the tears and other lovely liquids flew to go get his sister -- the last to be picked up (mother of the year award to me) -- and find out from the overly friendly after care guy that she's doing great except for that wandering off and disappearing stuff, oh and a little drama among the girls, but no worries. Yes, a runon sentence. Followed by a fragment.

Lovely first day we had in these parts, people, just lovely, and since the aide WILL be returning to after care, AND he doesn't know he also will have a classroom aide tomorrow (not sure why she didn't show up today as she was supposed to), and since everything never gets easier, I will grammarize any way I please, including double negatives, thankyouverymuch. Let the new year of my whinefest commence freestyle, baby!

For those who insist on bright sidedness, I can offer you this:
We adore the aide. No matter the Rooster's newfound quest for independence, he has always deeply adored her, because she rocks the spectrum. She comes early sometimes, stays late often, helps him do his homework and learn such essentials as Capture the Flag and how to not freak out on a school bus ride to a field trip, and did after school as well as summer camp for two years. She said my boy had a great day until I arrived, not just in after care but in class, as reported by his teacher. (sigh)

AND, since I'm on a roll, all cheerful and such, the after care director at the new school turns out to be the same guy who was the Rooster's camp director the past two summers, and we love him.

And really I saved the best for last, in case you somehow made it this far and you needed a reward.
We sent a Rooster Manual in to the new teacher today, inspired by the ultra fabulous and supremely wise Redhead Momma, and this is what the new teacher wrote back:

"Hello!
Thank you so much for the booklet to introduce Rooster to me. It was very helpful for me to know a little more about your wonderful little boy. I will keep in mind the information you have shared.
I am looking forward to a great year.
Mrs. Y"

Once I got over the shock and the weepy joyful tears, and the second rock of shock and jubilation and heart skips, I began to worry. You know, because last year we lost the first wonderful teacher the boy had by Halloween and the second before winter vacation, and the third teacher was good but lost his job by June due to budgets. And also because, well, that's how I roll.
Please send Mrs. Y wishes for good health, job security, but no lottery winning until next year.
A little birdie told me she has a fondness for ice cream so I'm sending her Baskin-Robbins certificates tomorrow.

Tomorrow. I can hardly stand the thought.